I have made a few life changing decisions in the past week, changes that I believe are necessary for my happiness and well being.

The first decision was to simply scour clean my Facebook friends list, deleting around 1,100 people who, at some point in my past, had crossed my path and decided to friend me there. The vast majority were ‘friends’ from my time spent working for a mega church. Now that I’m unaffiliated I had almost no desire to remain friends with them. Secondly we’re coworkers from jobs I have held, they’re gone too, as I really haven’t bothered to keep up with them.
Third were the people I followed and friended back when I thought being a good Christian boy was the key to my happiness, Goodbye.

So, now at a more comfy 193 friends (and still eyeing that particular list) my Facebook feels lighter. Eh, I’m never on there anyway.

Secondly was I cut out my beloved Monster peach teas in the morning. Yes, they’re delicious, but seriously, what are they doing to my insides? Three days after my last one my knee suddenly stopped hurting. I’m not entirely convinced that’s the cause but still it’s nice to not have to take an Advil a day just to walk pain free.

Third I’ve decided to sell my house in Tennessee. I’ve come to realize that as much as I love it, it’s a mill stone around my neck always tying my back to an area where I’m not sure I was ever really happy. I mean, yes I had stretches where I was relatively happy, but something has always just been ‘off’ here… I think I’ve finally divorced myself from the idea that I have an obligation to hold onto the family home that my grandfather built. I currently have a nice family living there and seeing their posts on Facebook with the kids enjoying the house and yard gives me a sense of peace, knowing that this is the right thing to do. Plus, imagine what I can do with an extra $1300/month.

Lastly was to begin to seek real, seriously deep friendships. To explore myself and what makes me happy. To cease hiding ‘me’ because of fear of what others would think. If I never choose to show myself to anyone, not even when I peer into my soul while looking in a mirror, how can I ever expect anyone to come to love the real me? How can I even love the real me?